An Islamic Review of the Tradition of Elopement of the Sasak Tribe
-- Siswantini Suryandari
There needs to be a review of the tradition of eloping (merarik) in the Sasak tribe so that it reflects Islamic law.
MERARIK, a tradition of eloping among the Sasak people, Lombok, which has been passed down for generations. A man kidnaps his girlfriend and takes her to the man's family home to marry her.
The tradition, called merarik, is still being carried out by the Sasak people. However, the book Merarik on the Sasak Society, History, Process, and Islamic Views, by Kaharuddin Sulkhad, examines this tradition from a religious perspective.
Sulkhad in his writings linked this tradition with Islam as the religion of the majority of the community.
In terms of attractiveness, in Sulkhad's view, the girl who is carried away by the man of her choice at night carries a dangerous risk.
When a girl is taken away, she can experience a period of danger, for example, another boy is attracted to the girl and triggers a fight with his opponent.
On the other hand, Sasak men are allowed to date girls who will be their wives before deciding to run away. As a result, many men are dating the same idol girl.
Like the confession of a mother whose child was taken away by her future husband. Many men do midang (dating) their daughters. However, the parents did not know which man had kidnapped their child, of the many people who had their child's death.
Such conditions are very common in the Sasak community. Shulkad observes this tradition through Islam as the religion of the majority of the Sasak people and Lombok in general.
No proposal
There are some things that are contrary to religion. In the 172-thick book published by Ombak Publishers, Shulkad sees that in the drawing tradition there is no process of proposing or applying. The reason is that girls are not betel nut, so that future husbands do not need to propose or apply in front of their parents.
Then, the girl's parents did not know who took their child. In other words, parents do not know the future son-in-law.
In the process of escaping, girls who are taken away run the risk of experiencing physical violence, harassment, and other things that are quite dangerous. Many problems occurred after that. For example, during a wedding, the woman asks for a marriage guardian ( pisuke ). However, not all prospective son-in-law and in-laws are willing or agree.
When the couple is married, then they visit the house of the female parents or are called nyongkol. However, wrote Sulkhad, there needs to be a review of the Sasak marriage customs. The author, who is currently completing his doctoral degree in law at the Faculty of Law, Gadjah Mada University (UGM) Yogyakarta, suggests that it is interesting to reflect Islamic law, namely that in marriage there must be a proposal. The man's family proposes to the girl in the woman's family's house.
All elements of society, including religious leaders, must be involved in preserving the Merarik custom according to Islamic law. Likewise, at the time of marriage there must be a guardian from the woman.
According to him, the tradition of merarik that has been passed down from generation to generation can be maintained as long as the factors that cause a shift in traditional values are considered from an early age. (M-2)
Source: Media Indonesia , Sunday, 18 August 2013
source: lunik